We Find Our Way
Also by Reyna Biddy
I Love My Love
A Psalm for Us
We Find Our Way copyright © 2022 by Reyna Biddy. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews.
Andrews McMeel Publishing
a division of Andrews McMeel Universal
1130 Walnut Street, Kansas City, Missouri 64106
www.andrewsmcmeel.com
ISBN: 978-1-5248-8314-0
Library of Congress Control Number: 2022933819
Editor: Patty Rice
Art Director: Holly Swayne
Production Editor: Brianna Westervelt
Production Manager: Cliff Koehler
Ebook Production: Jasmine Lim
ATTENTION: SCHOOLS AND BUSINESSES
Andrews McMeel books are available at quantity discounts with bulk purchase
for educational, business, or sales promotional use. For information,
please e-mail the Andrews McMeel Publishing Special Sales Department:
for umi.
you matter the most to me.
who you become in this life
who you were before you got here
how i can best assist you to reach
your next destination. so i start with
love, as always. you are in safe hands.
i trust you, do you trust me?
you are a reflection
of everything
i’ve ever loved.
and everyone who’s ever
meant the world to me.
my soul mate. it’s nice
to meet you again.
contents
open
student things
help me sing
master lessons
in this life
off course
in tune
new age
the sun
before it’s too late
new dawn
spirit message
what holds us?
go blind
see through
the fool
divine timing
let the bells ring
clarity
beauty to me is faith.
bitter truth
something tells me
and beyond
nectar of life
funny like that
do you promise?
light work
miscarriage
spirit says
my old lady
good woman
i receive it
someone else
scorpio moon
blessedness
forgive me
lotus
wheel of fortune
Grandma Theresa
tourism
and so
be patient with
your journey.
antibodies
May 27th 2020
circle back
void of course
in general
tables turn
what power
butterflies
good thing
get lucky
envy
saying grace
sunday blues
my fault
summer time
spirit guide
be kind to your elders
fate calls on us
universe
to be continued
silly me
not today,
not tomorrow
pour out
when you purge
florida waters
meeting joy
tribe
new visitors
make peace
in waves
spring cleaning
honey child
good grief
clockwork
join me
forever more
dead weight
see you
we
find
our
way.
OPEN
The melancholy of my life seems to be well balanced with the breeding of joy; whether i am to be on the giving or receiving end. I’m compelled to produce a love that’s intimate, between you and I. The uncertainty of my life has become humorous. Mocking even. Followed by signs, lights, numbers, wind, water, birds—I surrender. I am holy. I am magic. I affirm it to be true. When it’s my time to work, I have no choice. When it’s my turn to pour, I give myself. I recognize the obligations set on my life, I must search for the truth, then tell it. I understand the responsibilities that come with the gift of believing. Sometimes it’s easier to be a fool. One might believe, when you live in the unknown you keep your sanity—your soul even. I’ve made a contract with spirit. I understand what’s expected of me. Voice, laughter, song. To stay aware, and alive, is no easy task. This world wasn’t groomed for survival. We show ourselves, then we disappear, only to be reborn again. But to whose jurisdiction? Human? I’ve grown tired of human shit. I’d like to choose my heaven, and settle in. Our return mustn’t be so redundant. How dreadful to start over . . . and over and over again. I spread myself thin, if it means i’ll be rewarded.
The return varies.
I cannot confirm or deny the luxuries.
To see through all things. To see all things so deeply.
A harsh power one can hope for,
and regret at the same time.
When i first began writing poetry it was an effortless duty. I’d form words and create stories, pulling from both feelings and experiences, that were no longer a reality in the present. Often i go back and i don’t remember anything. 20 years of purging—well done. At 26 I have no recollection. The thing about me is, after i grieve, i isolate myself from the process of healing. I only take my badge with me. Moving forward, and beyond, toward the next process. onto the next project. then again.
I wish it were easier to sit still.
student things
you think you know
discipline, patience,
empathy, and strength..
until you give birth
to your teacher.
help me sing
what i’ve learned
is, i discern best in
the dark. it’s hard
to be candid
under bright lights
what i’ve learned
is distractions don’t
always come in flesh.
heartbreak
doesn’t always
come with healing.
holding grudges
for a moment,
adds more lives to you.
the karma brings
you back a few times.
tears cleanse the soul.
pain is a magnet
pay attention to
what attracts to you.
pay attention to
what y’all birth.
pay attention
to your baby.
you gave her life.
master lessons
you cannot evolve
while holding onto
those who are incapable.
in this life
we tend to get caught up in the aesthetic of things. we learn to care about reputation before self preservation. we fall in love behind closed doors. we laugh at jokes that we could never say aloud—due to the fear of being seen. scared to be ourselves. scared being ourselves will never make the cut. at some point, we became too serious. we’ve labeled everything as problematic. we’ve forgotten how to mind the business that pays us. i’ve learned to be accepting of it all. the love, the hate, the neglect, the skepticism, the criticism, the praise, and everything in between. i’ve never cared to be anyone’s favorite. i don’t believe i’m here for that. my purpose is quite simple. break generational curses. escape generational trauma. speak the truth—as i know it. share my journey as i go. give reference and resources if possible. connect the dots for others. connect others—with each other. be a source of light. raise a village with, and of, love. leave control behind. leave judgment behind. leave baggage behind. and most importantly, pay dues to karmic debt. i can’t say the same for you, but i’m ready to ascend. i’m ready to be a hummingbird or a tree. i wanna be freer than this lifetime’s freedom. stuck no longer resonates. no longer stuck in the matrix of distraction.
i wanna get out for good.
off course
you can never be who you’re meant to be
if you’re worried about how people
will view you every step of the way.
in tune
you ever look
inside yourself?
all bloody and blue
fluids done built up,
all the passion done grew.
you ever dig out the weeds,
dig out the bad things?
i think that’s what we pose to do
gather the forest
the ever dying lull.
you ever have a green thumb?
know exactly what to work on?
you ever know the right ones to pick?
you ever rake out the leaves?
i think that’s what we pose to do—
gather unconditional love for eve
for being curious enough.
for being honest enough.
for being such a woman.
such a passionate woman.
such a notorious woman
to be remembered, so harshly.
to be judged prematurely.
—you ever think that of you?
you ever wonder what they think?
me? i wonder where this leads.
i wonder where this goes
i wonder do we find our power
after fully transitioning.
i wonder where eve goes.
i wonder if ever, she takes me.
i wonder if she takes me
—will i miss it here?
i bet, you’d miss the green
you miss the breeze
you miss the daze
you miss the ways of no worry
no responsibilities.
i bet you miss human things.
you ever protect yourself
from the outside world?
you ever sit alone
closed doors
in a zone?
you ever lock the war
outside?
___________
today, while i was writing
the war was outside.
the virus was spreading,
the love was gone.
i was looking for incense to burn.
i found one called “rain forest”
almost burnt it for you.
i thought—“but what if it manifests?”
what if the rain
spreads n spreads
beyond the fire;
beyond our being.
you ever concerned about the flood?
you ever find the flood arousing?
you ever look inside yourself?
all bloody and blue.
you ever dig out
the poison?
find the ruin,
find demons,
find fear?
new age
the matrix is draining
see-through, really
everyone wants to be
what the next person
wants to be
nobody likes the body
they were given
revisions unnatural
soul work on standby
the process stays
disrupted, mind
wandering.. spirit
wandering. no fulfillment
just satisfaction
temporarily. promise
land not always ripe
fruit and white roses.
sometimes you meet
heaven in the ugly things.
the matrix rejects
the ugly things so
i stand outside in
my truth undressed
no mask on, no lies
this way
i learn, i see
who’s dressed
the best
this is a sign to face
your addictions.
call them by their name.
take accountability
for the part you played,
and stay away for a while.
the sun
when people show you
themselves, believe ’em
blessings in disguise
god’s favor on you
mirror staring back at you,
god’s favorite tool
so now it’s—
onto the next, shit,
before the demons
get too comfortable.
before the demons
multiply. one on top
of another, slow dancing
with yours. dirty dancing,
oh my.. eyes meeting eyes.
your eyes locked on mine.
what a blessing
to circle back
on a familiar love.
love this familiar
keeps you
in the ring with god,
it keeps you resisting.
hesitant
look—reality is reality
the truth will never stop
showing its face
will never put a mask on.
do you care
about my well-being?
do you care
to ask me questions?
do you care
about my blessings
the way i
celebrate yours?
do you celebrate me?
do you celebrate me?
do you celebrate
me?
do you care
to ask me questions?
do you care
about my blessings
the way i
celebrate yours?
is your head high?
how high can
you take me?
can we fly?
can we float?
do you love me
enough to never
get too comfortable?
cause.. if not, it’s
onto the next shit
’n onto the next
here’s
to never settling.
here’s
to confiding
within.
before it’s too late
i forgive myself
for all the times
my intuition
tried to lead me
out of a toxic
situation and i
stayed thinking
better would come.
new dawn
pray the bad blood
into blessings.
bless those
who got away.
water yourself
into a new day.
leave ’em
dying for thirst.
spirit message
the
bonds
you’re
holding
onto have
expired.
what holds us?
it is your responsibility
to differentiate which
energies are for you
and which are working
against you. this doesn’t
mean you have enemies
present, or on standby.
sometimes, these are
your loved ones. many
folk will deceive you.
will perceive themselves
to be a caregiver. will
give you poison in a
rose and not even
know the damage
from the thorns on
their own heart. the
truth evolves at last.
show them no mind.
show them love, still.
go blind
speak up
if you have to.
let it out
when you’re ready.
only
if it makes you
feel—
only if you feel
called to share.
condolences
and check-ins
make me uneasy.
make
me
remember
too much
of what i want
to
forget.
let me
go blind
see through
self awareness is vital.
if you don’t know yourself,
how can you recognize another?
my issue
is i’m always
missing
old versions
of people
the fool
don’t ever let anyone
practice on you.
don’t let them
prepare themselves
for the next thing.
don’t be the demonstrator.
don’t teach ’em about
the next life, if they’re
halfway in this one.
don’t ever be the fool
and if you do..
if you do,
don’t hold yourself
from starting new.
there’s larger mountains
there’s fresher dew.
the skies clear as day
find a better view.
a greener green
a bluer blue.
something beautiful
start fresh.
start new
start new
and if you do..
if you do
won’t you
be the fool
who—loves
harder
divine timing
watch what you say
when you speak to me
watch what you say
when you speak on me.
watch how you speak
when you speak about me
use your venom loosely.
obarra osa, what goes out
—will come back to you.
words won’t prosper
the same
i promise
the downloads
go crazy
you are see-through.
i know you from before,
since before this life.
our bodies were one
our power—overkill.
we were cursed,
we were forced to separate.
our soul
split down the middle.
we were torn apart.
ever since,
my soul has been
searching for you.
we came here
for each other
twin flame shit
it’d be a shame
it’d be a shame, truly,
to have to find out.
so, watch how you speak
when you speak about me
use your venom loosely.
what goes out
will come back to you.
words won’t prosper
the same
i promise
i know you from before,
since before this life.
let the bells ring
when company
arrives i set
us both free.
take us on a ride
too intense
to sit quiet for.
our parents
didn’t show us this.
didn’t love like this.
i grant you
permission
to love on me
your hardest.
to touch on me
again. please do
that thing again
where you let
your guard down
and tell the truth.
please do
that thing
you do, where
you let me in
and you let me
love back on you.
our parents were
too afraid to love like this.
clarity
here’s to manifesting
a new life. a clearer vision.
an abundant love.
here’s to opening
our hearts to those
who need us, and
walking away from
places that serve us
no good.
here’s to starting new,
without hesitation,
as often as change
requires us to.
beauty to me is faith.
some days, we can agree there is a god.
we’ve cried out for the same things.
in pain, in shame, in agony.
we’ve yelled out—in tears, with joy
with love, with grace.
we’ve made the same promise,
to be good.
so good, we repent.
we pray for both forgiveness
and freedom
from the mistakes we’ve made
we’ve lost our sense of conceit
we’ve lost our desire to be mortal
we wanna live with this moment forever.
things are good here.
—YOU—
where did you learn to be this good?
who did you speak to, to find me?
hide and seek, it’s possible
my demons sought out for you.
do you really believe you could love me?
do you really believe in a love
that could last forever?
do you—truly believe in
all ways?
you n me, we could pray on it.
we could talk to god together
ask ’em about the chances.
ask ’em to do us this solid,
say—just this once.
and believe it to be so.
and just believe
—we both believe in this
just as much, as one another.
beauty to me, is faith.
at the end of the day,
i wanna say i do,
and believe you do, too.
bitter truth
if i believe you to be
the person, i know you can be
i will do my best to show
you yourself. i will hold you
up high, in the light of lights.
i will say i care,
in more ways than one.
if my words
are too bitter a medicine,